The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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