what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I just found puke in my bra..
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
