operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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