I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
