i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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