How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
