i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
