Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Randomize