he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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