ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
