evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
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