She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize