I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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