screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
