Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
You ate ashes out of my bong
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
