"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
