Me too!
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
pray to the hookup gods
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
