u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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