Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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