it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
