Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Randomize
