ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
how does that bad decision feel?
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