whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
try to milk me bitch
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