I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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