Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
