everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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