who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Randomize
