just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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