if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
