I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Vodka?
Forever.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize
