I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Will exercising make me less horny?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize