so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
God, I missed his penis.
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