just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
