if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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