This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
