I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
