Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
