Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
