can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
