You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Randomize
