Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I'm passing your future prison.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
