i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
