idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
