soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
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