i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
