I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize