bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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