Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Randomize