Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
My vagina just clenched in fear
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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