I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Woke up backwards on a recliner
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
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