We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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